"Last Action Hero" movie; does it "suck" ?

"Last Action Hero" movie; does it "suck" ?

Post by Gary Dunc » Sun, 19 Sep 1993 19:44:22



This movie is due for release "Down Under" RSN, and since I'm
going to a gathering of 'glitterati' in a day or so, I would like
to impress the gathered throng with some cool throw-away lines
about its merits (or otherwise). I _could_ mention your name,
more * the better. The Finns seem appropriate here...

Didn't get any intelligent response from my question about "Jurassic Park",
except for some wild tangents which flew off into the fate of mankind
or some such irrelevant topic.

Please; don't want to waste $7 on another loser-movie...

- Gary  
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"Last Action Hero" movie; does it "suck" ?

Post by Evan Kirchho » Mon, 20 Sep 1993 04:49:12



>This movie is due for release "Down Under" RSN, and since I'm
>going to a gathering of 'glitterati' in a day or so, I would like
>to impress the gathered throng with some cool throw-away lines
>about its merits (or otherwise). I _could_ mention your name,
>more * the better. The Finns seem appropriate here...

It sucks bigtime, and I'm not just saying that because it has become
the conventional wisdom about that movie, which has already gone down
in flames "Up Over" (the lowest estimate of its cost is $70 million
; the advertising probably cost another $30 million, and when it
finally went whimpering out of the theaters, after being beaten into
submision by not only Jurassic Park but such movies as Sleepless in
Seattle, it had made a pathetic $55 million or so).  I saw it on the
day it came out, and I thought it sucked then, too.

It's basically a hodgepodge of clever action-movie jokes, stupid
action-movie jokes, blindingly unfunny jokes, and jokes that are just
plain odd, all patched together with a bunch of sappy sentimental
schlock.  It's a movie designed by cynical people, based on studies of
the sorts of movies that make a lot of money (for example, they
concluded that "family-oriented" films were twice as likely to break
$100 million in ticket sales, so they paid the reasonably clever
screenwriter William Goldman (Misery, The Princess Bride, etc.) a
million dollars to spend a couple of weeks patching more "family"
elements into the script (I think he's responsible for a lot of the
sappiness)).  The producers were confident that Last Action Hero
couldn't possibly fail, and when the test audiences hated it, they had
no time in their release schedule to try and fix it up -- they just
had to ship the movie out and hope for the best.  I like Hollywood
movies, and most of them are designed with a certain cynical eye
towards marketing considerations, but Last Action Hero finally went
too far, and it deserved to die, IMO.

Hopefully, this will push Arnold back into _real_ movies like, say,
Terminator 3 (yes! yes!).

Quote:>Didn't get any intelligent response from my question about "Jurassic Park",
>except for some wild tangents which flew off into the fate of mankind
>or some such irrelevant topic.

You know, this thread reminds me of the pressing nuclear waste
disposal problem...

Quote:>Please; don't want to waste $7 on another loser-movie...

If you thought Jurassic Park was a loser-movie, then you'll absolutely
hate Last Action Hero, which is about 1/3 as much fun.

--


 
 
 

"Last Action Hero" movie; does it "suck" ?

Post by Daniel Barre » Mon, 20 Sep 1993 08:52:38



>If you thought Jurassic Park was a loser-movie, then you'll absolutely
>hate Last Action Hero, which is about 1/3 as much fun.

        Well, I enjoyed "The Last Action Hero" very much.  It's not a perfect
movie, but I found it to be a (sometimes) hysterical parody of action movies.
The "Hamlet", "dog pyramid", "area code", "animated cat", and other jokes
had me laughing hysterically.  The "Houdini ticket" premise is stupid, and
the ending degenerated into boring action-hero stuff, but the first half of
the movie was wonderful.

        TLAH is definitely not a typical Schwartzenegger movie.  It has an
odd subtlety that people either like or hate, without much range in
between.  It worked for me, and it was *much* better than Jurassic Park IMHO.

        Obligatory Amiga comment:  rumor has it that all of the special
effects in "The Last Action Hero" were done entirely on a 512K Amiga 1000
with 1 floppy and a genlock.  Believe it or not! :-)

                                                        Dan

 //////////////////////////////////////\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\
| Dan Barrett -- Dept of Computer Science, Lederle Graduate Research Center |

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"Last Action Hero" movie; does it "suck" ?

Post by Evan Kirchho » Mon, 20 Sep 1993 16:42:58


[Last Action Hero -- we're still on topic!]

Quote:>    TLAH is definitely not a typical Schwartzenegger movie.  It has an
>odd subtlety that people either like or hate, without much range in
>between.  It worked for me, and it was *much* better than Jurassic Park IMHO.

Well, I got the clever bits, and I could see the action-movie parody
it was sometimes trying to be, but they shouldn't have had to verbally
explain each joke so rigourously (it seemed like they were constantly
afraid the audience wouldn't "get it") (on the other hand, some of us
have seen a lot more movies than others); if they'd have played the
whole thing straight, it would have been hilarious.  The movie was
still a disjointed mess, though.  And oddly enough, a lot of the
special effects looked pretty cheesy for a $70-$100 million movie.
You're right about the beginning being better than the end; I thought
the funniest bits were the car chases and the L.A. police station
stuff.  Overall, I still give it a "sucks!" -- I had very high
expectations for it.

--

 
 
 

"Last Action Hero" movie; does it "suck" ?

Post by Quentin Moh » Tue, 21 Sep 1993 14:46:13


But of course the biggest relief of this movie having passed on is that

WE DON'T HAVE TO SEE THOSE GODDAMN BURGER KING COMMERCIALS ANYMORE!!!

:-)

 
 
 

"Last Action Hero" movie; does it "suck" ?

Post by David A. Rolli » Tue, 21 Sep 1993 15:29:37



>But of course the biggest relief of this movie having passed on is that
>WE DON'T HAVE TO SEE THOSE GODDAMN BURGER KING COMMERCIALS ANYMORE!!!
>:-)


Hear! Hear!

I HATE THOSE COMMERCIALS!

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"Last Action Hero" movie; does it "suck" ?

Post by Bernd Felsc » Wed, 22 Sep 1993 13:38:48



  (Daniel Barrett) writes:

Quote:>    Obligatory Amiga comment:  rumor has it that all of the special
>effects in "The Last Action Hero" were done entirely on a 512K Amiga 1000
>with 1 floppy and a genlock.  Believe it or not! :-)

With comments like that, people might call you Marc. :-)
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